Mental Suicide
by Journey Into Darkness
Summary: Oneshot. Her mental state wasn't anything... Unhealthy. At least, she didn't think so. Written for Audrey & Terilyn.  ankCM &  iamtb on Twitter  This is my first attempt at a FanFiction. Don't be too hard on me.


"I am in a lot of mental pain. Other then at work, I am always alone. My mind wanders off to a dark place when I am alone. Most people would consider the images forming in my head dark and disturbing, but I don't mind them... There is just something about them that I can relate to... Something in the way these thoughts make me feel.

I am not turning into a serial killer... Oh no. I profile serial killers every day, and I would know if it was something like that. Emily Prentiss- a serial killer? Can you imagine that? It isn't anything like that. There's nothing wrong per say, it's just...

It is the feeling as if I am going mentally numb. I have dark, and scary dreams. I keep on having this re-occurring dream."

The psychiatrist is taking notes... Why is he doing that? I am perfectly fine. I keep telling my team that there is nothing wrong, but they just won't listen.

"What do you think triggered all of this?" the psychiatrist asks me. I try to think back to when this all started.

"...Him."

"You mean the man who tried to kill you, but ended up dead? Ian Doyle."

"No... It's someone... Someone I love. Him."

"I understand if you're not up for sharing who "he" is, but- Now that we have found the root of your... Mental state... Can you tell me about the dream you have been having?"

Mental state? What does he mean by that? I am perfectly fine, thank you very much! I would know if there was something wrong with me.

* * *

><p>I run.<p>

I've seen this many times, so I know where I am going. I need to find him... And I need to save him, before she gets there. I need to stop him from making the worst mistake of his life.

I am running down a dark, dirt road. I can't see much, but I can hear someone else running. It must be her. I have to make it to him first...

The darkness feels like it is about to swallow me. I fall, scraping my knee... I get up and feel the warm, sticky blood, dripping down my knee, but I can't stop now! I get up and start to run again.

As I hear her getting closer, my run turns into a sprint. I need to make it to him!

I can see the stairs now. I am so close! I run down the stairs, trying my hardest not to trip and fall. As soon as I find the end of the stairwell, I see the door. It is a metal door, no windows. I try kicking it down, but it doesn't work. I try to remember back to my other dreams. How did I open this door?

I can hear her, slamming something against the door. I want to scream out to him, and tell him not to go with her. I fear I am too late, but I can still hear him moving around in the room. I slam myself against the door as hard as I can... Falling to the floor, sobbing.

Why wouldn't the door open? I need to save him. I love him! He can't trust her.

The door opens just in time for me to see her, holding up his almost lifeless body, and waking him. He opens his eyes. I know I am too late. I wasn't the one to save him... I wasn't quick enough. She will make it to him first every time. I can't do anything about it. He loves her too much.

I look up to see the love of my life, Aaron Hotchner, and the woman who I now see as an enemy, Beth Grant. He will never love me. I will never make it to him in time.

Beth raises her gun. This part of my dream was re-occurring also. It seemed as though whoever did not make it to Aaron in time, was shot... And every time it seemed to be me.

* * *

><p>Emily Prentiss wakes up; Beads of sweat rolling down her forehead.<p>

Why is this happening to her? Why is the man she loves with someone else? Why does she keep having this dream?

Emily decides what she is going to do. It may not be the smartest move to make, but she believes it will help her get rid of this dream.

She showers, and then changes into sweats; not the most attractive choice, but at this point, Emily really didn't care.

She drives. She knows exactly where she is going, but no idea what she is going to say.

She pulls up into the driveway of Aaron's house. She nervously walks up to his door, and knocks.

"Emily... It's 4 a.m... What's the matter?"

"Hotch. I love you... I needed to say that. I've been holding it in for a very long time and it's caused me a lot of pain. It feels better getting it out. I'm so sorry for any inconvenience this may cause..."

Emily walks away, not sure if what she has just said was something Hotch wanted to hear... But it made her feel a lot better knowing that he knew... And he decides where they went from there.


End file.
